Will We Ever Learn to Listen?

Dr. David McAlpin is our pastor. He is a gifted communicator and a better person. Today he shared something about listening and that trigerred some thoughts of mine.

One of the great faults of the American citizenry is that we don't really listen to each other. Much of the time we are wanting to interrupt with our special "expertise" about whatever the subject might be. Failing to listen to what is being said and endeavoring to understand what the speaker is saying is a large part of the reason there are so many divorces in our country. In Congress, Republicans do not listen to Democrats and Democrats do not listen to Republicans. Each party is so intent on pushing its agenda that they act as though no good idea can come from the opposing party. If you are a Republican, certainly no good idea ever came from a Democrat, and if you are a Democrat, Republicans are clueless. Liberals do not listen to conservatives and conservatives do not listen to liberals. Is it any wonder that we are in such a mess in Iraq!

James 1:19 say this: "My dear brothers (and sisters), take note of this: Everyone should be quick to LISTEN." On our way home from church this morning, I said to Sue that the art of listening should be taught in our schools. I don't remember hearing anything about that until graduate school in the counseling curriculum. Upon returning home, I looked in Anita Woolfolk's "Educational Psychology" textbook that I used to teach a class of that name, and I found these thoughts on page 488 entitled "Reaching Every Student:"

"Mrs. Perez and her fourth-grade class are working on a unit on social skills in social studies. They are learning the skill of LISTENING to someone who is talking by doing the following:

1. Look at the person who is talking.
2. Remember to sit quietly.
3. Think about what is being said.
4. Say yes or nod your head.
5. Ask a question about the topic to find out more.

According to the text, that came from "Including Students with Special Needs: A Practical Guide for Classroom Teachers' by Marilyn Friend and William D. Bursick.

Those social skills should be taught to presidents, senators, representatives, governors, music writers, husbands, wives, boys, girls, dogs and cats. Every person in America needs to be taught these social skills and apply them in their activities.

In leadership, I teach that LISTENING is the first characteristic of a serving leader because of its importance. A nation's policies would be altered, friendships would be strengthened, marriages would find healing, writers would have more patience, and the United States would be a greater country if these "special education" truths were practiced.

Will you give real listening a try? It might be surprising what you will learn.